Dumbass Report: Special Police Edition

Sergeant Fired For Walking Through Bar With His “Weapon” Exposed
Sergeant James White, formally of the Charlotte County Sheriff’s Office in Florida, has been fired after Internal Affairs investigated and found he intentionally exposed himself in a bar.

According to the Internal Affairs report, the incident happened last August at Leroy’s Southern Kitchen and Bar in Punta Gorda during a detective promotion celebration. Several civilians and CCSO employees reported seeing Sgt. White “intentionally exposing his scrotum and testicles outside of his unzipped fly” while in full view of other patrons at the bar before walking around the business and while seated at a table, where he is said to have intentionally positioned himself to provide an unobstructed view… Read more here.

Officers Accused of Making Drunk Prank Calls to 911 Operator
An Indiana sheriff’s deputy and a police officer allegedly made prank calls to an emergency dispatcher while drinking at a house party – and were arrested after one call was traced to a phone owned by one of the officers.

Hamilton County Sheriff’s Deputy David Needham, 39, and Cicero Police Officer Bradley Gorgas, 40, were charged with one misdemeanor count of false reporting, according to court documents. Needham allegedly disguised his voice and made the first call using his own phone and claimed to be a woman named Jessica who needed help with a boyfriend who was stalking her and where they could find him… Read more here.

Cop Claims Dirt on His Food, Turns Out to Be Seasoning
A Fort Myers police officer noticed the word “POLICE” appeared on his ticket and suspected something devious because he hadn’t noticed the descriptor before. He complained on Facebook that workers put dirt on his burger. “At first I thought it was just burned old bacon, I was hungry and ate the burger, at the last bite I saw dirt and grit on the burger. In disgust, I threw it out of the window,” he wrote in the since-deleted post written under the Facebook name Mac O’Durham.

He also indicated that when he went back into the restaurant to complain the staff “had a good laugh,” because there was no dirt. After senior level Fort Myers Police Department officials and the restaurant’s regional manager reviewed surveillance footage of employees preparing food on the day in question, McCormick just mistook the salt and pepper spice blend for dirt. And the “POLICE” label, each guest is asked for their name and he responded with “Police Officer”… Read more here.